HELP SPREAD THE WORD

The LORD who existeth not hath commanded me to drive a Ferrari. That His mighty word might be spread among the nations. Well, there's plenty of foreigners where I live so I'll go round their house in the church's company car and then they can take it unto the nations thereafter, that should do the trick. GIVE until you bleed. Give.... Give and be Healed. It is easier for a Camel to enter the Kindom of Heaven than for a rich man to ... um... it is easier for a Rich Man to enter a camel... if thou art RICH give generously and salvation shall surely be YOURS. Sort it out. And don't ask questions.

Hear O Israel. Hear anyone for god's sake. Look it you bastards.... um... my children... the point of a totaliser is that it totalises... which implies that you send me some money... see how it works? Either you want the Word to be spread at Ferrari speed or you want me to carry on pottering about in my 1992 Renault Clio, which as I have already told you is absolutely on its last legs. If you want the word of the LORD to be carried at walking pace (cos walking is what I'll be doing soon enough) then ignore the plea that the LORD has asked me to promulgate unto you and we'll see RIGHT SOON who is coming to the big nothing in the sky with me. Get your fucking wallets out. Jesus.